Quote of the Week

“Faith is a matter of blind obedience, not human logic.”

That’s good isn’t it?? I read it in my devotional this past week and have been able to apply it about a hundred times since then. :) Just wanted to share!

Adoption is Greater Than The Universe

Here is a short five minute clip of John Piper talking about God’s heart for adoption…
(You'll have to pause the music on the bottom of the blog page to hear it.)

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.” Ephesians 1:3-6

Every Life Matters

Now, I know there are mixed opinions out there about the Duggars from “19 Kids and Counting”, but all opinions and criticisms aside, I do believe that they are great Christian examples that are unfortunately scrutinized by the public because of how they have decided to live their lives. Michelle Duggar was pregnant last year with their 20th child and miscarried at around 18 weeks. After her miscarriage there were people out there that were not so understanding and supportive, making very inappropriate comments about their situation. Come on people. The Duggars are people too with real emotions and it doesn’t matter that they already have 19 kids, a life is a life. Losing a baby is never easy.

The episode where they found out they miscarried showed tonight and the cameras were in the ultrasound room when they discovered that there was no longer a heartbeat. It was a very powerful, raw and real moment as one of the first comments that Michelle made, through tears, was, “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away…Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Wow. What a powerful message that society as a whole is not hearing. They see Christians talking the talk when everything is going well, but how powerful to see professing Christians live out their faith when life gets tough.

I think I cried throughout the entire episode as I grieved with them and relived all of those moments that we too experienced when losing our own baby.

Throughout the whole episode the Duggars talked about how they know that God works all things for the good, they quoted scripture, they sang “Jesus Loves Me”, they thanked God for the baby’s life, they were grateful for the time that the Lord gave them with the baby…it was just amazing to see, with the rest of the world, their faith during such a hard time. God DOES use all things for the good of those who love Him and I just pray that He uses their testimony to touch lives and bring others closer to Him. That’s the type of thing that He can do through the difficult times in our lives. And that’s pretty cool if you ask me.

“My Hope is in You Lord” by Aaron Shust

I meet with You and my soul sings out
As your word throws doubt far away
I sing to You and my heart cries
"Holy! Hallelujah, Father, You're near!"

My hope is in You, Lord
All the day long, I won't be shaken by drought or storm
A peace that passes understanding is my song
And I sing my hope is in You, Lord

I wait for You and my soul finds rest
In my selfishness, You show me grace
I worship You and my heart cries "Glory
Hallelujah, Father, You're here!"

My hope is in You, Lord
All the day long I won't be shaken by drought or storm
A peace that passes understanding is my song
And I sing my hope is in You, Lord

I will wait on You
You are my refuge
I will wait on You
You are my refuge

My hope is in You, Lord, all the day long
I won't be shaken by drought or storm
My hope is in You, Lord
All the day long I won't be shaken by drought or storm

A peace that passes understanding is my song
And I sing my hope is in You, Lord
My hope is in You, Lord, yeah
My hope is in You, Lord

What Really Matters

This devotion was a great little reminder to me that God’s will is what really matters above my wants and desires. So often we go to Him complaining about our life circumstances when we really need to be going to Him praising Him for holding us up during those life circumstances…

From Girlfriends in God on January 12, 2012…“Far too often I seek God’s blessings instead of seeking God. I seek His hand instead of His heart. Like a child with a long Christmas list, at times I run to my heavenly Father as if He’s a celestial Wal-Mart purposed to satisfy my every want. Instead of leaning in to hear the whispered will of the Lord, I selfishly shout my will. My desires. My demands. I’d rather have relief from life-pressures than gain the strength to endure them and the lessons I’m intended to learn from them. When I’m desperate to fill my over-sized heart-cart with things that I think I need, I rob myself of what really matters: the pursuit of God and the blessings found in Him alone.

Why do we desire God’s intervention in our lives more than His presence? Why do we think that we know what we need? It’s so arrogant of us to tell God how to be God. Isn’t that what we do when we stomp our feet before His throne and whine about all of the things that need fixing instead of praising Him for the strength He graciously gives us to endure? While we’re certainly encouraged by Scripture to make our requests known to the Father (Philippians 4:6), the highest calling on our lives is to love God with all of our hearts, souls, bodies and minds (Matthew 22:37). What really matters is seeking God first.”

That’s good stuff, isn’t it? :)

People Don’t Think

I was talking to a girl at my church this past week and I asked her how things were going. This is the answer I got… “I have 14 weeks left in this pregnancy and I am just soooo ready for this all to be over with, you know?”

No, actually, I don’t know. I would actually LOVE to have 14 weeks left in a pregnancy. Poor you that you are uncomfortable, but you know what? Suck it up. You aren’t getting any sympathy from me woman.

Anywho, just had to share. :) I wish people would a) get a little perspective and b) think before they speak!

No updates…

I was reminded by a friend this morning that it has been awhile since I have posted anything. Why? I don’t really have any updates…

The only kind of update that I have isn’t positive but I am not really letting myself worry about it either. We received an email from our agency letting us know that there is a possibility that referrals will be slowed down due to the fact that the US and Russia have both signed the Bilateral Agreement on Adoption and are waiting for Russia to ratify it. This will most likely occur sometime after Russian elections are held in March. After ratification, they are expecting that the MOE (Ministry of Education…who is responsible for adoptions in Russia) will develop regulations to implement and execute the ideas put forth in that agreement. This will be time consuming and may well slow down the adoption process over the next few months.

Goodie.

God is in control though, and again, was not surprised by any delays that may come as a result.

So, we are hanging in there and trying to go about our normal life in the meantime. Worrying and stressing over it will not do anyone any good. God will bring us to Russia to bring our child home when the time is right.

I am though getting more edgy when people ask me for an update. I KNOW they just care and are genuinely invested in our lives, but I don’t have an update and it hurts me to tell a million people a million times a day, “Nope, no update! It could be tomorrow, it could be a year from now. God is in control. Thanks for asking.” I wish it didn’t bother me to have to answer that way, but I wish I could just not talk about it. I can feel myself being short with people and almost blowing them off, and I don’t mean to be that way…but I guess I just get tired of having to give the same answer. Anyone else in the same boat as me get annoyed when people ask for updates? Tell me I’m not alone here… :)

One Year Birthday

Today (or thereabout) would have been our baby's 1 year birthday. She is not here with us to celebrate with cake and friends, however, today I do celebrate that we had 14 weeks with our baby and that one day we WILL be able to celebrate together!!

I'm doing good though...this had the potential of being a rough day, but I really am okay. God's good like that. :) I know God's hand is in all of this and He is in control. I'm sad that our baby isn't here with us but God has a reason for not allowing that. My job is just to trust. Today I do that. Trusting Him that His plans are better than mine!

The Battle is Against Satan

I received many emails, comments, texts, etc. after my last couple of posts and I appreciate the prayers and concern so so much! I wanted to share what one of those emails, from a good friend and adoptive mother, said. It is a great reminder for all of us that are in the midst of a battle, regardless of the kind, that I think we often forget…

“I have to say the only reason I can surmise [for all of the hurting, pain, etc.] is to point a finger at one person and one person only.  It would stand to reason that this one person would be the only one who would benefit from any resistance to a child being placed in a loving home or a Christian couple uniting with the child God intended to be a part of their family, because he is the only person who would want this process to be extended, if not all together stopped.  Yep, you guessed it, satan.  While it seems our struggle is with the international country, the government, or anyone who could possibly delay the process for adopting parents, it is really a spiritual battle.  You are at war.  And, not only that, you are winning.  Therefore, it stands to reason the attacks (aka...friends hurting and struggling, family illness, death, day to day living struggles and pessimistic thoughts creeping into your head...) would increase.  But, my dear friend, you know the end.  You know God is victorious! He defeats satan.  Hold fast to His plan.  Don't lose sight of it, no matter what!  Tighten your belt, devote even more time to God's word, or prayer, or praise music, or whatever, hold on tight to Jesus' hand!  It will be a bumpy ride, but in the end, you will have a beautiful child to raise for Christ!  When that day arrives, all of this will be a distant memory, instantaneously!  The moment you see that baby's face for the first time, you will know it is all worth it….eternity, which is the real reason we are involved in God's plan of adoption in the first place, is so much longer.... and it will be worth it!”

Amen! :)

Goodbye and Good Riddance January

I say that and February hasn’t started off the best either, but…

January was a rough month. There has been so much pain, hurting, disappointment and frustration around me. It is laying so heavily on my heart. I feel like every time I turn around there is another person I am lifting up to the Lord. I am so glad that the Lord has blessed us with prayer and the ability to lift our friends and family up to Him, but it hurts me to see so many others hurting around me.

My first week back at work after the holidays one of my coworkers passed away fairly unexpectedly. This continues to be tough for all of us who worked with her, and obviously her family, with so many reminders around us of her absence.

Then our good friends Rachel and Jeremy that I referenced here had their second miscarriage within a 4 month time span. I hurt so much for them and hate to see my friends suffering like that.

There have been several other things going on in our lives that seem petty compared to people losing loved ones so I am not even going to go into detail. But there has been a lot going on personally that makes for a pretty icky month.

January came to a close with that disappointing adoption news that I shared yesterday.

So I thought…surely, surely, February will be better. January is over and February is a new start. Then I wake up this morning and our lizard is dead. (I know, it’s weird that we have a lizard but I am allergic to anything with fur or feathers…so a lizard and fish is about all we can have in the pet arena.) I am telling myself that he died before midnight so it doesn’t count for February. But my goodness.

I don’t say all of this to throw myself a pity party…just to say that thank goodness the month is over. God is so good though and will give us the strength to get through it all. He wants us to look to Him, not at our circumstances. He can see the whole picture and we just simply cannot.

So in the midst of it all, I am praising God that HE can give us hope even when things around us seem hopeless. HE can give us peace in the midst of the storm. HE can show us the way when it seems like there is no clear path. HE will see us through it all!!! Even the icky Januarys.