Thankful

I have posted something like this before but I am going to again because it has been on my heart. I am so thankful for the stroke. I don’t for one second think, why me? The stroke has made me who I am. I don't wish it had not happened. It is so true what it says in Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Below is a list (not everything!) of the good that God has brought about or the things He has taught me as a result of the stroke.

Patience!!!

No control over my life - God is in control, God is over all the details (not in Russia, after both required trips),

Gods heart for His children

God's immeasurable love

experienced God as Comforter, Healer, Peace Giver

Was forced to put priorities in place,

closer walk with God,

constant dependence on God,

contentment, peace and joy despite circumstances,

constant prayer,

not to worry over little things,

God gave me time to spend with E and not rush around

life is short, not to worry/stress about the little things - don't let them get to me (I have been through worse, there are bigger fish to fry),

trust Him with EVERYTHING

Learned the principle of Sabbath; allowing yourself to rest and not be enslaved to busyness

Mom and dad moved close by; closer relationship with them and they have a relationship with Elijah, my mom is able to drive to Birmingham to be with her mom

Field trip

Today was Elijah’s first 1st grade field trip. I went...well, me and my entourage. Haha. Ok, really it was just my mom, dad and I - but it seemed like an entourage. You see, I always envisioned going on field trips with my child and being a contributing person - driving other kids — chaperoning. Things are a little different now. My dad was there to push (it was mostly outside and the wheelchair is hard to push on uneven terrain), my mom was there to carry things, run after Elijah, etc and then there was me. I couldn’t do much outside on my own and wanted Elijah to be with his friends anyway, so he either had to join another group or one of my parents had to keep up with him (he runs EVERYWHERE). 

I felt very useless. To be truthful, Elijah kept coming over to me, so I had a purpose in being there, but I feel like having a pity party. Elijah told me that he wanted me on field trips and that I was not in the way. In the end, that’s what matters. My parents did a great job too. Ok, enough is enough. Pity party over. 

Health problems

Oh...sweet Elijah has had health problems lately. He started having a difficult time breathing about a month ago. He takes really deep breaths constantly because he feels like he can’t get a good breath. We went to the ER, pediatrician twice and a pediatric pulmonologist. No one can find the cause so we get a test lined up for spring break. The day after the pulmonologist visit, he falls running face first (hands were in his shirt so he couldn’t catch himself) into a brick paver. He needed another trip to the ER and 9 stitches. It could have been SO MUCH WORSE though, God was watching out for him... I can deal with stitches. Then, the week following the stitches, he comes down with a fever bug (99-101) for a week! We go to the pediatrician AGAIN. (During that week we go back to the ER to get the stitches out). Fever goes away for a few days and now it’s back!! 101.5 last night. 

I sit here now awaiting results from the test that was ran Monday (doctor himself left a message yesterday and I have called him back)... I could be freaking out but a verse keeps going through my mind:

2 Timothy 1:7

7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 

Not fear. A sound mind. I breathe.