APAC Respite

Last night was the APAC respite. APAC (Alabama Pre/Post Adoption Connections) - a support agency for adoptive and foster parents, as well as prospective adoptive parents. This is the agency I used to work full time for and now work as a contract staff (I just realized I haven't posted about that...I will another day). Respite - many of these adoptive parents are also foster parents and cannot leave their kids with anyone that is not DHR cleared. And/or there are parents who have adopted older kids. These older kids often have emotional challenges. ALL parents need a break! There was dinner, games, crafts, etc. It's a great opportunity for children who were adopted to be around other kids who were also adopted. 

ANYWAY, our small group (and some additions), volunteered and it was so awkward/uncomfortable for me. I ran registration (like I always used to do...part of my job was to coordinate these respites once a year) and had a very difficult time. I had a hard time stacking papers, could not take the name tags off the label sheet (in my defense they really were difficult labels ) and had a hard time communicating with one of the parents. 

THEN, after registration, I tagged along with one of the groups (because what else was I to do?) and the awkwardness continued. I tried talking to the kids and they looked at me like I had two heads (unless I knew them), I couldn't play games/basketball/do crafts/etc with them. So I just sat there watching. Awkward. Uncomfortable. 

I am NOT asking for sympathy. That is seriously the last thing I want. It is just hard being at something you used to run...now being a spectator. 

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. (Psalm 139:13-16 NIV)