Yesterday was a hard day. I am helping in VBS (Vacation Bible School) this year, Elijah's first year at our church, and it is emotionally hard. I am helping in the babies class (3ish months thru a year) and I am really struggling with not doing what I used to be able to do. I am good entertaining or feeding (well I make a mess, but....) but need help picking up, etc. I can't change the babies positions, feed bottles, stand up with them, bounce...not a lot of the things that used to come second nature. I'm helping in there...just not what I want to be doing.
So, yesterday was not good. I had to come to grips with the new me. (I do nursery at church occasionally, but that is only for an hour and Elijah & Barry are there to help.) Today was much better.
I meditated on the scripture from 1 Samuel 16 which says, "The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart .”
I am serving God, He allowed me to be this way...so, I will keep trudging on, even if it doesn't look the way it used to. The Lord sees my heart, and that is what matters.
I took a break from preparing for VBS (Submerged) and read your blog. "Psalm 139:23 Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts."
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your frustrations and your heart of service. I pray that God will bless you and others through you this week! You encourage me to "keep on keeping on" as well - some days I wonder if I'm too old to be teaching kids . . . (Now back to prep, with 4 grand-kids and a grand-dog to help sidetrack me!)