"Lift My Life Up" by Unspoken

You brought me this far
So why would I question you now
You have provided 
So why would I start to doubt
I’ve never been stranded
Abandoned or left here to fight alone hope your leading me home
So I’m giving you control

I lift my life, lift my life up
I give it all in surrender
I lift my heart, lift my heart up
You can have it forever
All my dreams, all my plans
Lord I leave it in your hands
I lift my life, lift my life up
Have your way in me
Have your way in me

If peace is a river
Then let it sweep over me
I’m under fire
I know it’s refining me
When I hear you calling out
I follow now wherever the road may go
I know you’re leading me home

I lift my life, lift my life up
I give it all in surrender
I lift my heart, lift my heart up
You can have it forever
All my dreams, all my plans
Lord I leave it in your hands
I lift my life, lift my life up
Have your way in me
Have your way in me

Take my life and let it be all for you
Take my life and let it be all for you

I lift my life, lift my life up
I give it all in surrender
I lift my heart, lift my heart up
You can have it forever

I lift my life, lift my life up
I give it all in surrender
I lift my heart, lift my heart up
You can have it forever

All my dreams, all my plans
Lord I leave it in your hands
I lift my life, lift my life up
Have your way with me
Have your way with me

Take my life and let it be all for you.

Letting Go

Letting go is hard and I honestly don't exactly know how to do it. How do you get over:

-Not packing/buying last minute thing/traveling to Russia for the last time/spending planned family time as a family of three in Russia/leaving the orphanage with my son/not saying goodbye and thank you to his caregivers and our facilitators/flying with him for his first plane ride/not being home with him on his first night at home...

- Maybe never flying again (because of the possibility of the cavernous malformation bleeding again)

-Maybe having only one child - not by choice.  

- I could go on and on but won't. 

I know that God gives true freedom. I know that God gives true peace. But I also want to be completely honest. This is hard stuff...

Why Me?

From Girlfriends in God... 

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts’ (Isaiah 55:8-9, NIV). Friend to Friend There is nothing wrong with us trying to understand why the wounds of life occur; however, the Bible clearly tells us not to depend on or lean on our ability to answer the tough question…why.   “Trust in the Lord with all your heart,” the writer of Proverbs tells us, “and do not lean on your own understanding” (Proverbs 3:5). Don’t depend on your own mind to figure life out. Ultimately, God is in control and His ways are higher than ours. God reminds us, “’For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts’” (Isaiah 55:8-9). Dr. James Dobson, in his book, When God Doesn’t Make Sense says “trying to analyze His (God’s) omnipotence is like an amoeba attempting to comprehend the behavior of man.” It is simply not possible.        But one thing we can be sure of, “all the ways of the Lord are loving and faithful,” whether we understand them or not (Psalm 25:10). Paul wrote: “Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known” (1 Corinthians 13:12). It may not be until we cross over from the temporal to the eternal that we understand the many “whys” of life. Until then, we must trust in the sovereignty of God. No matter what we have gone through or what we will go through in the future, God promises: “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand: “ (Isaiah 41:10). God wants to know if we will trust Him no matter what our outward circumstances may be – even if it means death. Will we say with Job “Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him” (Job 13:15)? Let’s Pray Dear Lord, There are so many times when something happens in my life and I simply just don’t understand. It is during those times that I cling to what I do know. You love me. You have a plan for me. All your ways are loving and all your ways are good. Help me to remember that song in my heart when the melody grows dim. In Jesus’s name, amen

Peace

"Some people tend to believe that peace is simply the absence of problems, valleys and trials. Not so! Peace is a calm confidence that the Lord of the mountains is still on the throne - no matter how deep the valley may be. Peace recognizes Jesus walking on the water as He calms the crashing waves and stills the howling winds in your life. Trials become opportunities to trust God when peace reigns in a heart. That kind of peace can only be found in God. -Girlfriends in Gof

Bible Verse

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. (Romans 15:13 NIV)

More to This Life

Its amazing how your perspectives can change. Where I once was worried about what I weighed, what I wore, what others thought of me...I don't want to step on any toes, so you fill in the blank. Those things are so petty now...first world problems, as a devotional I read the other day called them. 

Now I am concerned with navigating the wheelchair or walker well enough to stay alone with my son, the tremors stopping enough to be able to crawl, I'm trying acupuncture, essential oils, yoga..Im very different than the Lisa 9 months ago. 

I have a new appreciation for life. I don't have time for all the petty stuff...there are bigger fish to fry. The things that once would have gotten me frazzled...not so much.  There is more to this life. 

A Bible Verse and a Devotional

“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus."  1 Thessalonians 5:18

And an excerpt from Girlfriends In God...   "Some people tend to believe that peace is simply the absence of problems, valleys and trials. Not so! Peace is a calm confidence that the Lord of the mountains is still on the throne - no matter how deep the valley may be. Peace recognizes Jesus walking on the water as He calms the crashing waves and stills the howling winds in your life. Trials become opportunities to trust God when peace reigns in a heart. That kind of peace can only be found in God."

Eyes and Glory

Well...there is still double vision...but it's better...so I really can't complain. This devotion seemed very fitting. From Girlfriends in God...

"The Israelites were saved, and Pharaoh’s army was destroyed - all under the watchful eyes of the LORD. God wanted to be glorified through a seemingly impossible situation. He wants to be glorified through the difficult situations that you face, too. If God is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31) When we stand with Christ, we stand with power. What Red Sea are you facing? Nothing is impossible with God. When you set aside your doubts and call on the name of the LORD, you can face the waters of your circumstances with a strong confidence, knowing that God is able and willing to do great things in and through you. Continue to follow the pillars of cloud and of fire of God's leading. You have a chance to bring God the glory of which He is so deserving!"

More Eye Surgery

I'm actually quite excited. I have eye surgery again this Friday.  Please pray that this procedure completely corrects the double vision and gets me back in contacts!! 

To Bring Him Glory

I've been thinking,...parenting is hard. Parenting a child adopted as a toddler is even harder. Parenting a child adopted as a toddler while being in a wheelchair, limited use of my right side and everything shaky is harder still. I say that not to throw myself a pity party, I say it because even in the midst of that I can still be joyful.

How? Because God created each of us with a different plan. We've been talking in SS about Job. How he was allowed to go through trials to bring God glory. We were each created not for our own comfort, but to simply bring Him glory. He has different plans for each of us, but the same purpose, to bring Him glory.

That brings me peace because I know I am just where He wants me.

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