The Great Commission

I feel greived today. Greived for those friends and family that don't personally know Jesus. What have I done to tell others, those close to me, about The Hope I have? I feel greived that I have not done more. I cannot force others to accept Jesus but I should share my testimony. 

I need to share how God gives me the strength to get out of bed every morning. How He worked out all the details of our adoption. How He used the pain of the miscarriage and worked out the details so that Elijah's birth date would be the exact day of our due date. I should tell of the indescribable peace I have been given through all of this. What about telling of the countless times prayer has been answered and there is no other explanation than God is real. I should share how I can feel His presence and know that He is real, alive, and desires a relationship with each one of us. 

I hurt for those that don't have a personal relationship with Him. I feel the desire to share my faith with others. Our time on earth is short and tomorrow is not guaranteed. I want my loved ones in Heaven with me, so I better be telling them that believing in Jesus is the only way to get there. Join me in being renewed in the Great Commission.

Matthew 28:19 NIV

"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit."

 

Night of Joy 2015

We are in Orlando for Night of Joy. We used to go every year but this is the first time since the stroke. For those of you that don't know, Night of Joy is a big Christian music concert held at Magic Kingdom. This year they have MercyMe, TobyMac, For King and Country, Mandisa, and more performing. They have four stages and all the concerts overlap. You see a few songs, ride a ride, go see someone else for a few songs, etc. Well, that has been great in previous years, but not now. I can't see over heads. When we come late, all I see are rear ends. When we come early (because Disney has a front area roped off for those in wheelchairs) we either get stuck for the whole concert (no going to see anyone else or ride rides) or we have to get there REALLY early (we got to TobyMac 30 minutes early and the wheelchair area was already filled up). 

It's not the end of the world. I am blessed to even BE at Night of Joy, so I shouldn't complain. It's hard but we'll just have to do things a little differently. God has called me to live this life. With His strength I will let the old way of doing things go and find a new way. 

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13

God's Creation

The Holy Spirit talked to me last night. Psalm 139: 13-16 says, 

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

It's always bothered me how there could be Down Syndrome or brain abnormalities, etc. Was Satan involved? Was it the result of a fallen world? I believe the WORLD sees these things as flawed and disabilities. But GOD, who created even these "flaws", sees us as His perfect creation. Every one of us. He has a purpose for us, just as we are, perfect in His eyes. 

"My Story"

This is so true of my life. I pray that I share it every day. 

"My Story" by Big Daddy Weave 

If I told you my story

You would hear Hope that wouldn't let go

And if I told you my story

You would hear Love that never gave up

And if I told you my story

You would hear Life, but it wasn't mine

If I should speak then let it be

Of the grace that is greater than all my sin

Of when justice was served and where mercy wins

Of the kindness of Jesus that draws me in

Oh to tell you my story is to tell of Him

If I told you my story

You would hear victory over the enemy

And if I told you my story

You would hear freedom that was won for me

And if I told you my story

You would hear Life overcome the grave

If I should speak then let it be

Of the grace that is greater than all my sin

Of when justice was served and where mercy wins

Of the kindness of Jesus that draws me in

Oh to tell you my story is to tell of Him

This is my story, this is my song

Praising my savior all the day long

This is my story, this is my song

Praising my savior all the day long

For the grace that is greater than all my sin

Of when justice was served and where mercy wins

Of the kindness of Jesus that draws me in

Oh to tell you my story is to tell

For the grace that is greater than all my sin

Of when justice was served and where mercy wins

Of the kindness of Jesus that draws me in

Oh to tell you my story is to tell of Him

Oh to tell you my story is to tell of Him

This is my story, this is my song

Praising my savior all the day long

Dishwashers

Dishwashers. They are not made for people in wheelchairs! I practically fall out of my chair every time I open that thing! I have to lean over awkwardly to reach the opposite side and to unload the bottom drawer...I can just barely reach it from the front (it may be slightly dangerous). The silverware is not easy to reach either. I should create a line of...everything. :) 

Pride

Pride. It's an ugly word but a pit so easy to fall into. I am told, "You're so strong" and it's easy to think, "you're right, I am". But I am reminded that it is not in my own strength on days like yesterday. Nothing really happened but Barry found me in tears when he got home. THAT is me. I would be a mess if I did this in my own strength. I love the lyrics in this Plumb song, "Exhale",

Oh God we do not exist for us

But to share Your grace and love

It is ONLY through God that I can sing that. I am thankful for reminders like yesterday to keep my pride in check. 

"Bring The Rain" - MercyMe

"Bring The Rain" - MercyMe

I can count a million times
People asking me how I
Can praise You with all that I've gone through

The question just amazes me
Can circumstances possibly
Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed
Long before these rainy days
It's never really ever crossed my mind

To turn my back on you oh Lord
My only shelter from the storms
But instead I draw closer through these times

So I pray

Chorus:
Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus Bring the Rain

I am Yours regardless of
The dark clouds that may loom above
Because You are much greater than my pain

You who made a way for me
By suffering Your destiny
So tell me what's a little rain

So I pray

Chorus:

(Repeats)
Holy, Holy, Holy
Is the Lord God Almighty

Listen here: http://youtu.be/e8HgAVenbUU

Change in Perspective

The other night, Elijah was in bed with us, and was having a hard time breathing because of a cold. I tried to get him to lay on his side to help with his breathing, but he wasn't having it. I had to turn over (on the side that, since the stroke, I have a difficult time falling asleep on - go figure), prop him up against me and put my arm around him. 

I could have complained that I wasn't getting any sleep, instead, I used that time to pray for others and to thank God that I have Elijah. I have learned (since the stroke, I often have problems falling back asleep when awoken) to pray when you can't sleep. It doesn't do any good to complain, what does good is prayer!

Stand My Ground

  My heart is heavy. There are so many hurting people in this world and it makes my suffering seem trivial. And yet all of it is temporary. 2 Corinthians 4:17-18 tells us,"For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

God is so good. This is the song that's on as I type.

"O' Lord" by Lauren Daigle

Whoa...

Though at times it seems

Like I'm coming undone

This walk can often feel lonely

No matter what until this race is won

I will stand my ground where hope can be found

I will stand my ground where hope can be found

Oh, O'Lord O'Lord I know You hear my cry

Your love is lifting me above all the lies

No matter what I face this I know in time

You'll take all that is wrong and make it right

You'll take all that is wrong and make it right

Whoa...

Your strength is found

At the end of my road

Your grace it reaches to the hurting

Still through the tears and the questioning why

I will stand my ground where hope can be found!

I will stand my ground where hope can be found!

Oh, O'Lord O'Lord I know You hear my cry

Your love is lifting me above all the lies

No matter what I face This I know in time

You'll take all that is wrong and make it right

So Right, Right so Right

I will stand my ground where hope can be found!

I will stand my ground where hope can be found!

I will stand my ground where hope can be found!

I will stand my ground where hope can be found!

Oh!!! O'Lord O'Lord I know You hear my Cry

Your love is lifting me above all the lies

No matter what I face I know that in time

You'll take all that is wrong and make it right

You'll take all that is wrong and make it right

Make it right. Right, so right.

I want to stand my ground until He makes it all right. Thank God we, as believers, have hope that this hurting is only temporary. 

A Gift I Can Add

I was going to write about a song, but this was more pressing. I found a notebook that I had started writing in before the stroke. In it, I was writing my list of blessings/gifts (from the book "One Thousand Gifts" by Ann Voskamp). 

I was struck by the fact that every last one I can still enjoy! I have many physical impairments, but none of them impede me from enjoying all the blessings/gifts that I listed! God is SO good! Now THAT is a gift to add to the list.