Barry and I had our regularly scheduled 14 week Dr. appt yesterday and they could not find the baby’s heartbeat. The baby was measuring exactly like it should but no heartbeat was to be found. We are in shock obviously…I actually felt the baby move on Monday night for the first time, which is pretty early but I am certain that is what I felt. Like a little flutter, not a stomach grumbling or anything else. I know that is what it was and by what the Dr. says because of the baby’s measurements and everything it had to have happened sometime between Monday night and Tuesday morning before our appointment. I know feeling the baby was a gift from God although right now it is making things harder because it made things seem so much more real. We have been overwhelmed by the outpouring of support from friends and family and feel so blessed to have all of those people in our lives. Please keep us in your prayers as we are really struggling with everything…we KNOW that God is in control. We just can’t quite figure out why He is allowing this to happen…but He knows. We are just trying to focus on the blessings even in the midst of the storm and appreciate every day that our baby was in our lives. Please continue to pray for us as we figure out where and how to go from here…we have another Dr. appt on Monday to schedule the D&C, so we have many more tough days ahead of us but we know somehow we can get through this with our Heavenly Father’s love, comfort and strength.
Lisa & Barry - I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. You are in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteOh I am sooooo sorry! This breaks my heart. It just seems so unfair, and while I know the pain and how it makes you question God, then be upset that you question Him, just remember that He is big enough for our pain, our questions, and our grief! Sending you so much love as I wish I weren't reading this and that you weren't experiencing such pain. Praying for you and for Barry!
ReplyDeleteOh Lisa, I am so sorry. This is not what I expected to read on your blog today. I am in tears. I'm just so sorry for you. I will be praying for you and Barry.
ReplyDeleteMy heart cries for you, as I can somewhat understand what you're going through right now. My mom told me, shortly after we went through this, that people will say things to you that will hurt. Please remember, that they just don't know what they are saying, and most of the time they think what they say is comforting. Allow your self time to grieve, and know that if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry to hear this! My heart is breaking for you! I don't know if you read my blog then, but this is exactly what happened to us. I don't want to get your hopes up, but know that God can work miracles and modern medicine is not always right. My doctor could not find a heartbeat or even an egg in my ultrasound. She was ready to do a D&C the next day if I wanted it. My husband said he just felt like we needed to wait to let nature take it's course. Of course emotionally I didn't want to wait longer than a week because i just couldn't take it. I wasn't cramping or spotting and I was still sick and had all symptoms of being pregnant so it was so hard for me. When we went back in the day before our D&C we had an ultrasound and sure enough there was a heartbeat and a healthy baby.
ReplyDeleteI say all that to say that I know the deep pit that you are in right now. I'm sorry that you are going through this. God is in control. Please make sure to have another ultrasound before the D&C just in case...
Praying for you!!
ReplyDeleteWe love you both so very much...words just can't explain what we feel right now!! We know that your prayers, as well as the prayers of so many others, will get the two of you through each minute of each day. God will also get you through whatever decisions need to be made in the coming hours, days, weeks, and longer.
ReplyDeleteGod Is Good and He Is Holy and He Is Love!
I know I just sent you an email, but I wanted to echo RachelP's comment. People really don't know what they are saying (some of the comments still made me angry though). And as she said take all the time you need to grieve and don't feel pressured to conform to someone's else timetable of when you should be done. Many people have trouble understanding this loss.
ReplyDeleteI am so sad. I wish I could be there to give you a big hug. Praying for you and Barry.
I am so sorry for what you and Barry are going through right now. We love you guys and are praying for you.
ReplyDeleteBreanne
Oh no. Oh hon I am so very sorry. My heart just breaks for you. It's so not fair and I cannot even imagine how devastated you must be at this point in your pregnancy. You will be in my prayers today, tomorrow and the next day as you go through this difficult time. ((hugs))
ReplyDelete"Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you." Psalm 143:8
ReplyDeleteOh Lisa I'm so sorry. I know exactly what you are going through and it's not easy but it did make my marriage stronger. I will be praying for you and Barry over the next few days. Let me know if I can do anything for yall.
ReplyDeleteOh...I am so sorry. There aren't many things that can be said...And like others have said, people will say things to you that they think will make you feel better (happened to me also). Just know that we all care for you and will be praying for you.
ReplyDeleteLisa, I want you to know that you are in my prayers. I wish I could hug you!!
ReplyDeleteLisa, I am so sorry. My heart breaks for you. I have been following your blog for probably the last 6 months. I have been through similar losses over the past months and I still don't have words to say that will bring comfort, except to say that I am praying for you and your husband.
ReplyDeleteLisa,
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry to hear this. My heart breaks for you and your hubby. As you said, God is in control. I will keep you in my prayers!
I just wanted to check back in tonight. And I agree with so many people. Don't let anyone tell you how to feel or when you should be ok, or anything else. Just know that the grief is a process (I'm sure you know this with your job, but it's easier to tell someone else than it is to apply it to yourself!). A friend of mine had a miscarriage today and then I heard that JJ Heller song "Your Hands", and I had never listened to the words, but wow are they true!! Praying you always remember that you are in His hands! Sending love!
ReplyDeleteso sorry to hear this, lisa:( you and barry are definitely in my prayers...
ReplyDeleteWow, Lisa, I can't even imagine how you're feeling, but know I'm praying that God will be close during this difficult time (HUG)
ReplyDeleteMy heart is breaking for you. I am so very sorry for your loss. I too believe that God has a plan. I am just sorry this plan includes so much pain for you.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It sounds like you have a very strong relationship with God. Please know I'm thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteMy heart hurts for you... I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that you and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteLisa and Barry, I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteI wish I had the right words to say... My heart is heavy in prayer for you and Barry during this time.
ReplyDeleteI am at a loss for words after reading your post but please know that I am praying for both you and Barry.
ReplyDeleteMy heart has been so heavy since hearing the news. I know there are no words to make you feel better; just know that you and Barry are loved very much and are lifted in prayer daily. If you ever want to talk or need a shoulder, I am here for you.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss...praying for you to find peace and comfort.
ReplyDeleteLisa, this might sound weird, but I heard Curry Blake say that he was able to raise twins from the dead in the mother's womb, after they were dead for a week or two already - why don't you contact them and hear if they can help you? Their number is 1-888-293-6591 and you can check out their website at http://www.jglm.org/. Just a thought...
ReplyDeleteThinking of you in this difficult time.
Lots of love and hugs...
I'm so very sorry...you will be in my prayers during this very difficult time.
ReplyDelete